Baby Got Back- Part 1

I don't think I can ever remember a time in my life when I was happy with my body. Even in high school when I weighed 140-145, I thought I was fat. I was by no means toned, or in shape. But I was not fat. I am famous for the phrase, "I will start my diet tomorrow." My friends could be millionaires if they had a dollar for every time I have uttered those stupid words.

This problem is deep rooted in insecurity and comparison. I have a serious problem comparing my body to others. I think this is something all girls and women go through. We compare our bodies, our clothes, our lives to one another. It's unhealthy and leads to some serious self worth issues. When we should have our identities in Christ, we instead place them in ourselves and our desire for what we should look like/own/etc...

Not where I meant to head with this post. Ok moving on. So, I worked at Hollister for a good 2 years of my life. Good can also be substituted in that last post for awful. No really, I liked it. Gave me a great excuse to listen to crappy punk rock music and I smelled like "Jake" everyday.

So, one year the crew decided to have a softball team. This happened to be the year that I was at my most insecure. I wasn't clinically bulimic but I was vomiting after every meal to try and shed a few pounds. I remember being so desperate to just good the food out of my body that I would hide in alley's after lunch and make myself vomit, and then continue on my way. Horrible horrible habit. Thank GOD it only lasted a few months.

Anyways, so the softball team was called the "Swamp Donkey's." I have no idea what that even means, but everyone got nick names to have printed on the back of their shirts. This sweet girl who was my friend, and had an enviable body got the name "Great A" printed on hers... meaning great ass. Mine said, "Fat Ass." They didn't even have the decency to just put the "A", no no, they put the whole word. I weighed probably 138 pounds, I was NOT fat. Ok so maybe my butt wasn't as tight as hers, but she played soccer. Of course it wasn't. Needless to say, I was offended (nothing against this girl, love her to death).

To be continued...

p.s. This is me and Sarah, my BFL partner. This is from Spring 2007. I am wearing my "Swamp Donkey's" shirt. I'm pretty sure I deleted all pictures with the back of the shirt on them.

Week 5 pics

Sugar, We're Going Down

I am happy to report that I tried on a size 8 cargo pants yesterday... and they fit. It was the best day ever. It really encouraged me to keep going with this Challenge even though sometimes I feel like it isn't working. It is, and the results are taking time. Nothing changes overnight, healthy weight loss takes time. This was especially encouraging to me because I was a size 12 this summer. On a bad day, I might even have to try on a 14. I'm serious, I promise I'm not making it up. I was 180 pounds on a 5'4 frame. Gross!

Also, I bought some really cute shorts from Urban Outfitters a couple of months ago and they didn't fit. My goal was to fit in them by my birthday, and they did! Barely, but they did! I took a picture to send to my mom when we went out last night. By the way, The Clay Pit is fantastic.

alli

P.S. The title of the post, referring to the size of my pants dropping, I'm goofy.

ok seriously

Literally 20 minutes after I posted, Dylan and Tyler walked in with a cake and champagne. How could they? I only had 3 bites and half a fluke (???) of champagne. I also busted my butt today on the treadmill and we did extra back exercises so I feel like it's ok..

Silly boys. They do not understand!

Hufflepuff Know Whats Up

The title to this post has nothing to do with anything, but it's my birthday and I do what I want. Ask Lindsey and or Katie and or Sarah.

Kidding. It's because I watched this earlier Like Its Quidditch.

So today was my birthday and I worked out. On my birthday. On. My. Birthday. This is big. I used to make up excuses as to why I couldn't work out and the perfect excuse would be, a birthday. I did not even cheat on this day! I could have eaten anything I wanted, but I didn't I stuck to it.

This leads to some frustration. I haven't lost but 3 pounds. And hardly any inches. They say the results don't really start coming in until 8 or 9.

Well I friggen hope so or I have missed out on SO much Chick-Fil-A... That isn't a very good attitude to have. But, it's my birthday.

Thank you all for the birthday via Facebook and such. I hope you all have a great rest of the week! :D

Why BFL?

Some of you might be wondering why I would do this to myself. I don't have time to write it all down today so here is a preview of why:

Me at 148 lbs July 2009                              

at 180 lbs July 2010

I will praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
Marvelous are Your works,
And that my soul knows very well. Psalm 139:14

Study Break

So, I'm at a coffee shop, Zera, and I'm cramming my brain full of information about Microbiology, Chemistry, and history. I think I might die. But the good news is, Monday starts Week 4 of BFL. That means we are 25% through. HALLELUJAH AND AMEN.

I won't lie people, I have some serious abs coming in.

The other day I was straightening my hair and Sarah pointed out the "blooming" muscles in my arm. I have never had that before... and it's only week 3!!! I am so excited. Especially because I have been so discouraged by the actual poundage lost. I stepped on the scale this morning, and it said 157.2. I have been hiding my scale in the closet to avoid the temptation to weigh again and again but, I just had to this morning.

Dylan and I went to the Melting Pot for dinner last night. Yumma. I didn't blow my free day, but I did enjoy the fondue. Plus, it is served with lots of fresh veggies and things so it can't be that bad right? Right. Okgood, I'm glad we all agree. Hope everyone is having a great weekend!

alli